Learning

One of my biggest regrets in life is not learning more when I was younger. I always had a hard time reading and paying attention. I felt different my entire life and really didn’t understand until my ADD was diagnosed in my forties. Everything seemed harder for me.

Now, that I understand myself more, it’s not something I could do easily with my chronic pain and other ailments. I would have loved to get a Bachelor’s or even a Master’s degree but even if I could do physically and mentally, I can’t do financially now

There’s plenty of free learning sites on the Internet I may look into further in the future but right now I’m enjoying little things I find new in every day.

During the past few years I’ve come across distant cousins and friends from around the world. I love finding out new things from them. A few more interesting countries where I have met others have been Iran, Indonesia, Philippines, France, Germany, UK, Australia, New Zealand, and Norway. I can’t mention them all but I have learned so much from them.

I even feel younger learning more every day. So go and find something new to learn today, I think your mind will thank you for it later.

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Die Another Day

Living with chronic pain is not a way you want to wake up everyday.  Some days are better but most are grueling, painful days that make it a challenge just to get out of bed.  There are times I hurt so bad that I cry just moving to try to get out of bed.  The chronic pain is a symptom causing my depression and makes it an endless circle of hurt, pain, and darkness.  

Last Thursday night I slipped and fell causing my toes to hyperextend and tear the skin requiring stitches.  This is the main reason I haven’t written in a few daystrying to recover.  It was very painful and even the ER doctor said he has seen this numerous times and hopes he never gets it because it is so painful.  So when you add this to the normal aches and pains can make you have a miserable day, no matter how well it might of been going.  Just today, I was dragging a box across the floor…walking backwards towards the couch.  This was such a big mistake!  I hit the end of the rug in front of the couch and went flying backwards right on my back.  I still am not sure if I hit my head on the floor or not but don’t think so.  I’m resting with my good friend, the heating pad on my back as I write this. 

Is chronic pain manageable?  Like I said earlier some days are better than others.  Pain management is a must from your doctor as well as seeing a psychologist and/or therapist.  I do this and try to accept my challenges to get on with life but on the bad days is like to die another day.

Moving On

In order to move on with your life, you need to face challenges holding you back. I have many challenges (some listed in the About section) and need to realize there are certain things I can and can’t change in my life. To confront your challenges may seem impossible and overwhelming. I thought that for years and almost given up on life several times. I see my primary doctor, therapist, and psychologist on a regular basis to help me achieve my goal to move forward. You are not actually living if you don’t change what you can or accept what you can’t.