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Remembrance

This July 4th there is a lot to celebrate being the 245th birthday of our nation. There is so much to be thankful for in America and I will not go into that in this post. I want to remember all my loved ones that are gone like I do on every holiday. I’ve been through a lot of loss and the only member of my immediate family left. I used to be sad and depressed on holidays and never looked forward to them. That has changed this year for me.

I am thankful for my new family and future I’ll be starting soon with the person I love. What better way to move forward is by remembering all the good things I loved most about the people who are gone. I’ll try to be happy carrying on all their good that I remember.

My closest brother Paul was my best friend and was the most kind and caring man I ever knew. I think I already have that characteristic and will continue. My brother Mark was a go getter and did whatever he had to do to live a life on his own and support his family. I know what I want in life now and will do my best to make it happen to start my new family. My parents did what they needed to do to support their children and stayed together through good and bad. Being disabled, I am limited to what I can do but I will fight and promise to love my wife and be faithful through any issues that may arise and support her any way I can. My grandparents were very loving and I definitely have that trait. I will definitely honor them by showing love and kindness.

“The Remembrance of the good done those we have loved is the only consolation when we have lost them.” (Demoustier). Of course they will remain in my heart forever and it’s easy to remember the happy times instead of the sad. When I’m gone, I hope I’ll be remembered for everything I have and will show to my family.

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Ancestry Finds

I’m the last surviving member of my immediate family. I have a few first cousins that are only Facebook friends. I don’t even have any contact with my only nephew and niece. I feel like I’m a decent person but my anxieties and depression hold me back. Being disabled for the past 10 years hasn’t helped either. I feel like my entire life has been a failure. Why did my line of the family get the short straw? Since I’m not close to any remaining family members, I found that the We’re Related application from Ancestry.com developers very interesting finding many famous cousins.

Through some of my famous cousins ranging from 4th through 9th, I realize we share some traits that made us who we are. I’ve always been interested in music and proud to be cousins with Jim Morrison, Willie Nelson, Avril Lavigne, Dolly Parton, Blake Shelton, Johnny Cash, Christina Aguilera, Carrie Underwood, Kanye West, and Michael Jackson. I feel that my love of all music types is inherited from my relatives.

My next love is writing. I wrote more when I was younger but share the love with Jane Austen, Stephen King, Mark Twain, and Edgar Allan Poe.

Leadership from thirteen presidents, many politicians, and even billionaires Bill Gates and Warren Buffett have influenced me throughout my life.

Another love is movies and have numerous famous cousin actors as well. Some include Katharine Hepburn, Robert De Niro, Kevin Bacon, Blake Lively, Shailene Woodley, Brad Pitt, Meryl Streep, and Johnny Depp.

Innovators including Thomas Edison and Henry Ford explain some of my love of trying to make things better but with no success as they did.

So why my Love/Hate feeling? I feel that I always had potential and didn’t make use of my skills before my ailments took control over me. I hate how my life turned out now only living disability paycheck by paycheck. My credit sucks and owe more in taxes and credit cards than I’ll ever be able to pay back. This is my own problem and take full responsibility for poor decisions. Having famous relatives hasn’t helped me but maybe why I love and hate them, or at least a little jealous. I love that we share some blood and very proud. Every person has potential, try your best everyday and maybe one day you’ll become famous for being you.

(Sorry I was very grumpy writing this today and definitely not close to my potential if my ADHD and other ailments weren’t kicking in)